Courage

I don't like that I need to be courageous.
And I don't like that I need to do it anyway because this is the right way and only way.
And I don't like that I don't like to be courageous making decisions.
(yep...you can start a tongue twister.)

Actually I felt like a solider going to battle when driving this morning. Thinking the negotiation may surprise Michael and imagine his face may look really funny. Maybe that is another way to cheer me up, I guess.

I did remember when leaving church office on Tuesday, the dream I told God once again. "IN CASE you forgot", I tried to be funny. "This is my dream", I turned my head looking at the building once again walking toward my car.

And the scenario sounds nice, right? Can't deny it.

:( I know I need to make decision.
I made a crappy list last night, but seemed to be not clear enough though.

Why am I so good at the negative thinking?
Uh? Uh? Why? Why?

And it sounds like I am still resisting growing up, being an adult!!